Tuesday, June 8, 2010

Impulse Control

Hello. *insert famous awkward smile here*

Really, if you spend enough time around me, you'll know exactly which one I'm talking about, but that's beside the point. You know, 'cause I usually get to my points real quick without dawdling around. /sarcasm

So this is take three of me blogging, hopefully I'll stick with it this time? In all honesty, I do enjoy it but I do feel like it's a tad too self-indulgent at times, but you know what? Nobody's forcing you to read my endless rambles and nobody's forcing me to keep writing.. yet here we both are!

So, today's topic is going to be impulse control.. as you might have already guessed from the title. I have none, basically. I get scolded time and again for being too impulsive but I honestly can't help it. Act now, think later- it's just always been the way I do things and I do regret it half the time but mneh, what to do? Like deleting my blog for instance, I swear, I have no idea how I did it. I just went to the settings and a few clicks later, Liloism was no more! I didn't begin to justify the reasons for doing so until after I deleted it.


It's not just stuff like that, it's trivial everyday things. Like when I'm at a restaurant and I'm done with food and waiting for the bill to come and I suddenly grab the ketchup bottle and squirt it into my drink. It's just because it's there and I'm so fidgety, I have to keep my hands busy. I realise how utterly insane it is after I do it but at the time it's like an automatic reaction. Or like a few days ago, I was out with N and we were at a traffic light, I randomly opened the door and just left it there until she was all "wtf!" then it occurred to me to close it. Again, it was just there and my fingers were itching to do something! Or like the time I cut my own bangs *shudders* a disaster I'm still recovering from. I try to keep it under control, but it's been getting out of hand lately. I'm writing about it to see if anyone else has the same issue, because it truly baffles me.

On another note! My name's Dalal, right? Well, no, not right. You probably don't already know that but seeing as there's at least 5,000 other Dalals in this country, I feel comfortable with disclosing that little piece of information. (Yes, the numbers are straight from up my ass and kaifi.) Anyway, I was playing WoW the other day, 'cause I have no life and I really like it now (side note: I will NEVER forgive the guys for making me play.. ever!), and I was talking to this other player while questing (LOL! I can't get over how nerdy it sounds, ah the shame.) and he asked what my name was. So, I answered and he asked if that was common around here (if you only knew, dear.), so I told him it was and he asked me what it meant! See, I think it's one of those names you KNOW the meaning of but can't word it accurately enough without ending up with saying something like "Oh, it means spoiled." F you, it does not mean that. I kill you with my eyes. Death glare and whatnot. Yeah, bitches. Back to the point, he looked it up and was all "btw, your name means coquettishness." which I love now and is my new favourite word. And I told my friend and he said it's surprisingly fitting, even though it's not an exact translation but it's cool, no? I will not let N saying it sounds like crotch grabber or *insert mail appendage starting with C here* sucker deter me from loving it.

One more anecdote before I leave? Alright! So yesterday I was at Caribou with my brother and we were getting drinks and the waitress was doing the confusing thing they always do

Me: I want the Caramel High Rise please.
Waitress: With cream? you want extra espresso shot? extra caramel?
*Dalal's in a rush and wants to leave so she does the stupid thing and says..*
Me: You know what? Whatever, go nuts.
Waitress: *confusion* you want nuts?

Epic fail. Sighs all around. Missed me? I know. Oh and I'm not changing the name, it's Liloism again only because the lovely Carpe Diem added it to her dictionary.

Adieu x

P.S. You better all be rooting for England in the World Cup.

P.P.S. Even though I used "yeah" I would like to clarify that "yeah" isn't a real word. To quote N, "it was invented by americans who aren't real people." Did you see that the "a" wasn't a capital letter? Just further goes to show you that they're not real people and I shall not treat their nationality as a proper noun. They masticate the English language which is NOT okay. Spoken like a true graduate of a British school. You proud, mummy N? *bats eyelashes*

P.P.P.S I really think there should be a limit on the amount of Ps we can use 'cause I'm obviously abusing it. If anyone's up for listening to something a little different, try Machine Gun by Portishead. Or Roads, to quote another friend, "it makes me wanna crawl up in the fetal position and cry" I swear when she goes "how can it feel this wrong?" I get goosebumps. But I'm a semi-sissy. And trip-hop isn't really for everyone, it's a weird genre and I'm absolutely in love with it. Portishead + Massive Attack are incredible.